I've been reading a lot.
I finished Fast Girls: Teenage Tribes and the Myth of the Slut a few weeks back, and today I finished Reviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls. Both were a little dated, and I didn't agree with all the authors' opinions, but I thought both were good reads.
Its changed my outlook on things a little bit. I kind of always recognized that I was fairly well together for a teenage girl. I had none of the factors that often produce troubled youth, like abuse, dysfunctional family life, or divorced parents. I don't think you can necessarily blame your actions on these factors and I don't think you can say that these factors will always cause problems in the future. But I definitely was friends with lots of girls in high school who had troubled pasts and who were developing bad habits in their lives. I lost a lot of female friends in high school for disapproving, "judging," and not joining in on their fun. I really don't regret having those friendships end. I've got much more stable friends these days. I'm proud that I held my moral ground back when I was young, but I do still wonder about those girls. I want them to be okay and sometimes I wish they still trusted me and talked to me about their problems. Maybe I was too uptight at times, but I never meant to hurt anyone.
All that to say, I've seen some messed up girls. I've read about a lot of messed up girls. I want to work towards helping adolescent girls be confident. I want to talk to girls and help them with their problems. I hate the media. I hate how it tells girls to use makeup and makes them want to diet. I hate how girls throw themselves at boys on tv and use their bodies. The media destroys girls. Lately, I've been watching commercials and I'm disgusted. If a guy uses Axe, he's surrounded by hot girls. Theres a weight loss commercial at every break, scheduled during shows that teens watch. Girls are meek and will do anything for a guy they like. And I hate it.
I alone have no power to change the media. But I don't condone it. I no longer find it funny when as a joke a girl is called a slut. Its not okay for a boy to say that to a girl, and its even worse that we girls call other girls sluts jokingly.
I'm going off on a tangent here. The media needs to change. Young girls need more independent female role models. And I hope to do something with my life that will inspire girls and make them believe in themselves.
I completely agree with what you're saying. I also had friends (especially in middle school) that I saw making bad decisions while I did not partake in their "fun." I have one old friend that I am still concerned about because I watched her spiral further and further from reality. I no longer have any contact with her, but I still think about her hoping that she's turned things around. The things is, her home life was not really bad at all (from what I saw, but there may have been problems I was not aware of) yet she let the media control her decisions because she was so insecure. I wish she had had better role models on television etc. In other words, I think the idea of helping work towards getting adolescent girls gain confidence is a great idea!
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